Fun and Youth Ministry

I think it’s time for me to talk a bit about fun in youth ministry. Regular readers will know that I think attractional youth ministry is a bad idea on various levels. But it doesn’t necessarily follow that we need to expunge fun from our youth ministries. In fact, I think fun is a vital element to a healthy youth ministry–just like fun is a vital element to a healthy family.

This isn’t to say that fun is the vital element, however. There are appropriate places for fun. Also, I should distinguish between fun and entertainment. It’s pretty common for youth ministries to be in the business of entertaining students. I’m not sure that’s a good idea. Entertainment is often non-interactive, or when it is interactive, it isn’t communal. Entertainment seeks to keep busy. By contrast, fun is interactive and communal. Fun isn’t about being busy, but rather about enjoying the moment.

What we shouldn’t use fun for:

Let’s start with the negative side of things. There are instances where we really ought to avoid using fun in a youth ministry. For instance, we shouldn’t use fun as an evangelistic strategy. That isn’t to say that Jesus should be boring (far from it), but we shouldn’t be working to “draw people in,” with fun. We should be working to draw people in with the love of Jesus and his message. Anything else misses the point. Anything else risks winning converts to something other than Jesus. After all, what you win them with is what you win them to. Our job isn’t to offer students fun and then sneak in a devotional. Fun should not be why teens come to our youth ministries. This isn’t to say we shouldn’t have fun at youth group meetings, but rather to say that we play a dangerous game when we use fun as bait to lure students into our youth groups. Students don’t need more fun. They need peers and adults who will love them, support them, welcome them, and walk the road of life with them introducing them to this amazing guy named Jesus. In fact, maybe the biggest problem with “fun” is that we somehow think that if we can just do an event that’s more fun, more students will come to our youth ministry. We use fun as an excuse so that we don’t have to do the hard work of changing our attitudes, being loving and open toward the stranger, and taking our focus off ourselves and putting it squarely on Jesus.

We should also be careful that we don’t use fun as an excuse for laziness. Sometimes it’s easy to say, “Oh, we’re doing this event to build relationships and be together.” That’s an awesome thing, and vitally important to youth ministry. But if what we mean by that is, “We’re going to have fun, because I was too lazy to think through what our youth ministry needs,” it isn’t a good thing. We’ve started using fun as an excuse.

What we should use fun for:

So, if we should avoid using fun as bait to pack teens into our youth rooms, what should we use fun for? The possibilities are nearly limitless. To begin, having fun with one another really is a great way to get to know someone. Part of living life together is having fun. Fun is a phenomenal way to reduce stress and practice Sabbath. Perhaps a practical example will be helpful. Last summer we did several “Days of Rest” with our youth ministry. These events were essentially times when we told students that we wanted them to practice Sabbath. We blocked out six or so hours at the church, and had students join us. We told them ahead of time that we weren’t going to have any “program.” We invited them to bring a book, a game, a frisbee, whatever. We spent the day simply relaxing, playing games, talking with one another, laughing, telling jokes, etc. We had a great deal of fun. But fun wasn’t the point, and we weren’t trying to keep students busy. I’m not so naive as to think all of our students really practiced sabbath that day. Many of them just came because they thought it would be fun. That’s OK, but our narrative wasn’t to come because it would be fun. That can make all the difference.

So, fun can be used for sabbath. I think fun is also a vital part of creating shared memories together. We tend to remember the good times, the fun times, as opposed to the bad times. You might be noticing at this point that fun is first a tool, rather than an end in itself. But you might also notice that fun is directed towards what we’d typically think is the “internal group,” those students who already attend our ministries. That isn’t to say that we should be solely focused on fun. Really, it’s important but should never be our focus. Most of the time, we have plenty of “fun events,” and what we need is more welcoming and support between the students in our ministries, more opportunities for them to wrestle with faith, more opportunities to pray, more adults who love them, more times of silence, more Jesus, not another chance to play kickball.

At the end of the day though, we should never try to avoid fun. Fun is part of the human experience, and certainly ought to be part of the Christian experience; it just shouldn’t be the only part of that experience. Where we need to be careful, however, is in attempting to use fun to draw students into our ministries. Fun doesn’t draw students in. It might get them there for a night (if they don’t have something more entertaining to go to), but it isn’t a long term solution. That way of thinking ends up making youth ministry into a series of programs we do to keep students busy, rather than a life we live out alongside students. What we need to do in our youth ministries is welcome students of all backgrounds, support them, and care for them–even when it’s their first night.

Advertisements

Fun…

Every so often I find myself reflecting on the programs and initiatives that make up a youth ministry. Those who regularly read this blog know that I constantly try to think in new ways about youth ministry, and encourage others to do the same. Even so, the temptation to jump into an entertainment centered style of ministry is difficult to avoid.

But trying to avoid an entertainment centered ministry doesn’t mean that we don’t have fun. In fact, for the students in many of our youth ministries the best thing we could probably do is give them space to have simple fun. We don’t need to go play laser tag, or go to a baseball game, or have a dance party, or rent a bouncy-castle to have fun. There isn’t anything inherently wrong with any of those activities, but they aren’t requirements for having fun. In fact, when we jam our calendars full of events like those, we often play right into a consumeristic society that values entertainment above engagement.

We’ve recently begun a new format for our Wednesday night gathering at our ministry. For the first three Wednesdays of the month we undertake the standard stuff: discussion, small groups, prayer, etc. But now on the fourth Wednesday of the month we just come and chill. We hang out and talk, play games, relax. In short, we spend time being together. I don’t feel any necessity to entertain people during this time. Instead, I talk with students, joke, laugh, relax, play games, listen to music, run around, and otherwise have fun. Last night, because of a couple (unrelated) program snafus, we ended up with a much larger amount of time to hang out. I don’t think anyone minded. In fact, it may have been just what the doctor ordered for some of our overstressed students (and adult volunteers!).

Fun is a necessary part of being human, and it therefore ought to be a necessary part of being the Church. But it is only our modern, consumerist culture which has equated fun with entertainment. Our students need time to be together; time to be with God; time to get to know each other and the adults in our ministries. But this doesn’t mean that every second of that time needs to be programmed to keep students entertained. We need to think differently. We need to be careful that we don’t teach students that life is about feeding whatever entertainment craze is currently in vogue. We need to teach them that Sabbath and simplicity are deeply biblical concepts that have huge application to our own lives.

Here’s the hard part: we have to find ways to do this, even when our students are convinced that what they most need is another thing to entertain them. I’ll let you know when I’ve figured that out.

Correcting some misconceptions

As I’ve talked with more and more people about attractional youth ministry and my own reasons for striving to find a different–better–way of doing ministry with students I’ve realized something. When I say I don’t like attractional youth ministry, or I have misgivings about it, or I’m concerned that it puts the focus on the wrong things what people tend to hear is, “I don’t want fun.”

This is actually furthest from the case. Fun–whatever form that takes–is a vital part of a healthy church, and a healthy youth ministry. Sure, if the only thing we ever do is “fun,” and we never do Bible study, or prayer or service then we’re missing the fullness of things (I should be quick to note that all of those things can and should be “fun,”). The problem isn’t with having fun, the problem is with replacing Jesus and his kingdom with fun.

One of the most successful youth ministries I have ever been a part of spent huge amounts of time being together, hanging out, talking, playing games, walking around town, going to a family’s cabin, playing games, going out to eat, going to movies, and playing games. These kinds of “social” times weren’t merely fun for us, but they allowed us to build trust with one another and enter into shared life–what we might call, community–on a very regular basis. The point of this stuff, however, was not to attract new students to the ministry. The point was for the Body of Christ to live life together.

As I told a student recently, regardless of how they might feel, the last thing their friend wants or needs is more fun. What their friend needs and wants (even if they aren’t at a place to articulate this yet) is something that goes beyond a culture that demands we be concerned with getting ahead. Jesus offers that. We need to stop being embarrassed by the counter-cultural nature of Jesus. At the same time, this isn’t to say that one should never spend time simply hanging out and being together. That is as much a part of enacting Jesus’ mission on earth as studying the Bible, praying or building homes; in our over-stressed and over-worked society, time to simply relax and be together is a vital spiritual practice.

Blog Meme

Oh, I’ve been tagged friends. Tagged not once, but twice! Both Adam and Kevin have done an incredible job of coming up with post titles that I could see myself writing. I laughed at both of them for a good five minutes. So, here are the rules for this meme.

1. Tag five Biblical studies bloggers.
2. Invent fictional posts that they might have written over the last month.
3. Link to the original meme post at Lingamish.

Earl Barnett at earlbarnett.com – “I’ve read another book by Alister McGrath, and you should too!”
Art Boulet at finitum non capax infiniti – “How [insert recent happening with the Red Sox] sheds light on Louis Ginzberg’s classic collection Legends of the Jews.”
Dr. George Snyder Jr. at The Rabbi – “I, Jeremiah…”

That, I’m afraid, will have to do. I don’t know any other Biblical studies bloggers who have not already been tagged.

A bit of news

I’m taking this week off from thinking (aside from work related things), so don’t expect blog posts of any substance unless I get a sudden and unexpected urge to actually use the gray matter contained inside my cranium. Much like Eric I intend to read fiction (currently the Memory, Sorrow, and Thorn cycle by Tad Williams), play games (specifically Tales of Symphonia, and if I finish it I’ll possibly start Arc the Lad: Twilight of the Spirits), drink coffee (which isn’t really a departure from normal. I’m currently brewing a fine Harrar and will probably crack open some Kona by the end of the week), and conquer the world with Mandy in Civilization IV. I’ll perhaps emerge from this cocoon of hedonism in roughly a week when I begin preparing for my Intermediate Greek class in Summer I, and finish up my Semlink.

But that’s not the reason that I even began this post. In my meanderings this morning I found this article on CNN.com. Roland Martin often has some interesting things to say, in my opinion; I thought his take on the whole Rev. Wright thing was fascinating (that, and I’m a karma whore).